Stuff That Has Been Bugging Me Lately

The idea of open marriage.--This morning as I opened my browser to MSN, I was greeted with the headline "The New Monogamy." Well this was just too interesting to me. Mostly because there's only one kind of monogamy--the "till death do us part" kind. I skimmed this article which was a sampling of opinions on the issue by what I assume the editors at MSN think are "experts." All of them sort of had the same opinion which was basically if it floats your boat, fine--but it's still weird. Not only weird, this is absolutely nuts.

A big part of being in love is desiring one person in particular over all others. It shouldn't be hard to do. It should be natural. I love Lewis and the very thought of being with anybody else borders on being repulsive. By the same token, the thought of him being with anybody else makes me incredibly sad and nauseous. I don't know how I would react to him cheating on me (and hope I never find out) but I know that it would hurt me more than anything I can imagine.

Anyone that enters into an agreement to marry someone but allow them to sleep around, is agreeing to become the world's largest doormat. What I would assume really happens in most of these open marriages is that one partner dates around a lot more than the other. Which means that one is left sitting at home while the other is out chasing . . . well, you know. Besides that, who wants to wake up on Saturday morning and look at their spouse and say, "let's spend the day together" and have the reply be, "Sorry, I have a date"?

The crux of the problem is that people really don't know what a marriage should be about anymore. It is a partnership that should be physical, emotional, financial, and even spiritual in nature. It is the most beautiful thing on earth if you will allow yourself to experience it that way. People that agree to these open marriages will never accomplish the oneness that marriage is supposed to be. Therefore, they have no marriage at all. They haven't really even attempted it. Ridiculous.

Secondly, I have to react to a response recently given in on my brother's blog. In the post in question my brother had expressed his belief that a father should have the right to deny child support for a child he did not want. I know this is a big kettle of worms, but the ensuing debate turned into a discussion of abortion rights. One commenter (who has expressed this opinion before by the way) said that men don't have the right to say anything about abortion. I think it is awful that he thinks that way.

The only line of reasoning that would lead you to say that is the one that says that a woman has the right to do whatever she wants with her body (which is having an opinion on the matter whether you are openly expressing it or not). The honest truth of the matter is that a woman does have the right to do what she wants with her body. She has the right to tell a man "no." She has the right to look for a secure relationship and financial situation in which to bring a child before she gets pregnant. See, the line of reasoning he is using assumes that it is really not any woman's fault that she got pregnant. The evil man in the relationship went and got this poor little girl pregnant. Well, it's just not that way. Except in cases of rape or incest, everytime a baby is conceived there are three parties involved. The man, the woman and God.

God makes babies. That's the only way to explain why every sexual encounter (protected or not) does not result in pregnancy. That's the only way to explain why for the first eight or nine months I was married I was not on any kind of birth control and didn't get pregnant. Ending a pregnancy is outside of God's will no matter who makes the decision, man or woman.

Furthermore, it bothers me to think that men don't think they should have a say in this. Everyone needs to learn to be responsible for their own actions. If men shouldn't have a say the abortion debate, they certainly should have the right to deny child support. After all, it's all up to the woman to decide, right? Divorce responsibility for any pregnancy from men and you really have a sad situation, don't you? The idea that a man does not have a say in the abortion issue just by being male does just that. It says that though it takes a man to make a baby, a man is not needed further than that. This idea reduces men to mere sperm donors. That's not fair to anybody.

Aside from that, what is so messed up about this whole deal is that there are people who are willing to commit the most intimate of acts with people that they have no desire to create a life with. If you think enough of a person to sleep with them, you need to also think enough of them to be willing to raise a child with them. This is why God created marriage and family--so we wouldn't have difficult situations like this. If everyone did things according to God's plan for bringing children into the world we would be a lot better off.

Men, you have a say. You need to express your opinion on abortion. You need to fight for the rights of the children you help create. You need to fight for your rights as fathers. You need to be men. Stand up for yourselves, because no one is going to do this for you.

The Dubai Ports Deal--Possibly the most frustrating thing about all this is how for the past four and half years we have been told that racial profiling is wrong. Then we turn around and against the advice of our administration we write-off the Dubai Ports deal because the people in question are (gasp!) Arabs. If we ever looked like jerks to the rest of the world it is now.

It's like when Marley was less than two and she would stand at my feet and cry and whine while I was trying to get a drink for her. She didn't trust me to do what I said I would do, even when I was working on it. President Bush has declared war on terrorism, but the majority of Americans don't trust him to discern terrorists from the good guys. Why don't they trust the President?Well, the media has made President Bush out to be a bad guy.

Let me ask you this--how many times in the reporting of this story have you heard the port deal referred to as "Bush's Port Deal?" I was not aware that the President owned any ports. Did anyone really know the facts in this story before they flew off the handle and reported a bunch of inflamatory rhetoric to mislead the American public?

It's ridiculous that they would think that while waging war on terrorism, the President would blindly invite other terrorists in. If the President really thought that there was a threat involved in this port deal, wouldn't you think he would have rejected the very idea? Do we really think that the President is just waiting to sell America to the highest bidder? To believe any of this is to suggest that the voters who elected the President are completely blind, obedient sheep, being led to the slaughter by an extremely evil man. How delusional can you get?

Not only that, but the media portrays this whole saga as being solely the President's idea and solely his responsibility when reality tells us that he is but a small player in a big play. We have got to start having more faith in him than this. He's been elected to lead us and whether or not we like him, we need to follow his lead. If we don't, the whole country looks like just what the terrorists make us out to be--jerks. So far, that's what we have been about the port deal.

This is not the first time I have been frustrated with the media lately. They worked really hard to make Dick Cheney's hunting accident into a murder attempt. I even heard one reporter say that the President was not commenting on the accident but it was obvious that he was frustrated at the distraction that the VP was causing. The distraction was not caused by Dick Cheney. He was involved in an accident. If he had been the one shot, no one would have dared call the whole ordeal a distraction. Of course, they would have made that look bad on the VP too. This was again an attempt to mislead the public. The first headline I read on this story said, "Vice President Shoots Man." If you didn't go any further into the story than that, you would be wondering what prison the VP was in while awaiting trial.

To quote Charlie Brown, "AAAAUUUGGGGHHHHH!"

Have you ever accidentally hurt someone? Do you know how that feels? I can't even begin to imagine how it must feel to accidentally shoot someone. I feel horrible when I step on the back of someone's shoe. Did anyone in the media take into account the feelings of Cheney or of his friend? Did any of them report this story with the sympathy that the parties involved deserved? No.

I realize that this happened several weeks ago. I realize that it may not seem very important now--but this problem is real. I'm very tired of the media making the current administration seem as evil as possible. Their job is supposed to be to report the truth and we are supposed to be able to rely on them to be impartial.

I hope that twenty years down the road we will be remembering what a great administration we have had under President Bush and that those who believe him to be an evil warmonger will be eating giant pieces of humble pie.